by Yvonne Bynoe on February 25, 2009
One of the perils of being a mother who works at home is the realization that the day is over and that you’ve done nothing. I don’t mean nothing in the literal sense—you may have done the laundry, ran to the dry cleaner or even made some goulash for your child’s International Day at school, but you haven’t produced any actual work or done any tasks that will generate income. Those unproductive days can turn into weeks and then into months. From the stand point of the Working Moms Balancing System (TM) this type of passive procrastination affects a working mom’s ability to live her best life and it negatively impacts her financial vision.
In some ways being on a 9-5 is easier. On a conventional job there is a routine or at least you’re accountable to a boss or co-workers to get things done. The exact opposite is true when you are a solopreneur, you’re not beholden to a set agenda nor are you accountable to peers or a boss—you’re it. Working unsupervised puts more responsibility for results in the hands of the work at home mother. This is great if you are high organized and disciplined, it’s a disaster if you are not.
By nature I am not the most disciplined person. I’m very good at organization when I have a set project and deadline, but I haven’t always used my “down” time well. In the past I kind of floundered between projects and made some inconsistent attempts to drum up business. I did okay, but looking back I could have done better if I had had a work plan.
I enjoy the flexibility of working at home (a few weeks ago I had to pick my sick son up from school) but I came to realize that as a mother who works at home it was extremely important that I have a weekly work schedule. My schedule now includes days that I’m getting actual work done and at least one day where I’m working on tasks to create new business opportunities. I also learned to delegate and outsource more tasks so that my days are filled with goal-getting activities, not mindless errands.
As a work at home mother you have to find a scheduling method that works for you–meaning that it resonates with your temperament and your duties (professional and personal). I love Danielle LaPorte’s blog, White Hot Truth and wanted to share her post, Entrepreneurial Time Management. It provides a good template for mothers who need to bring more structure to their work at home lives.
by Yvonne Bynoe on February 20, 2009
Your decisions create your life. Empowerment happens when you become aware of the importance of your day-to-day choices. This is not to say that external factors don’t matter or that the actions of other people are irrelevant. However in the end, you have to decide what you are going to do in each circumstance you find yourself in—your job, your relationships, your community. Those decisions and their outcomes are the basis of your current life. If we don’t like where we are in our lives, or want more or better we have to DECIDE to take a different path. Some people are scared of the idea that they alone are responsible for how their life is unfolding. Other people however feel liberated to realize that they can really improve their lives by making new decisions.
A lot of times we are afraid to make REAL decisions. We hem and haw or try to hedge our bets. We’re not 100% sure what the “right” choice is. There may be an opportunity waiting for us but we don’t act because we can’t immediately see it. In the midst of all our waffling we stay stuck in a situation that we have either outgrown or that is emotionally, physically or financially unhealthy for us. Motivational speaker Les Brown says, “Either you run your life or life will run over you.” He’s not saying that life is hard but that you must decide the path of your life or deal with the consequences of “not deciding.” By not deciding how you want to create your life you’re leaving it to other people and to outside forces to determine your future.
Let’s look at two co-workers in the same department of a company that has been going through financial difficulties for nearly a year. Jill decides she needs to get a new job at a more financially stable company. In the coming months she updates her skills and her resume and eventually lands a new position. Her co-worker, Jack constants debates leaving but is really unsure of his marketability. He justifies his inaction by saying that he doesn’t want to appear disloyal to his employer. Three months after Jill left the company files for bankruptcy and closes its doors. Jack’s very angry that now he has no job, no health insurance and no savings. In the same circumstance, Jill made a decision about her life and reaped the benefits of her choice. Jack however failed to make a decision about his future and suffered the consequences of his choice.
The Latin origin of decide means “to cut off, to kill off.” In short, making a decision is about cutting off other options…doing whatever it takes to achieve your goal. This means that REAL decisions are firm. If you have a plan a, b, c and a host of contingencies, you have not made a decision Real decisions are also made quickly…but NOT rashly. You carefully weigh the pros and cons and then you decide what you are going to do. You can make quick decisions when you crystal clear about what you want. In order to do that you have to align your values with your goals.
This key question to ask yourself is: What is in MY highest good? (not for my spouse, my children or friends) This may sound obvious, but when you’re struggling to make decisions, it may not BE obvious. To reconcile your values with your goals, you must define success for yourself. For you is success: making money?; having more free time to spend with your family?; having a more fulfilling life?; unleashing your passion, or something else? Once you identify what you TRULY care about you can more easily decide which activities/actions will get you closer to your goal and which will not.
This week think about a situation that is requiring you to make a decision NOW. Think about why you are avoiding making a decision. Consider what your life will look like in 6 months, a year or five year don’t decide to change course—if you continue to do nothing. Once you make a firm decision, you will open yourself up to new possibilities that will help you to create a new and exciting life move full of love, joy and prosperity.
